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Tracey Bethune on Business Unveiled

How to Attract Harmony and Fill Your Life with Energy

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How to Attract Harmony and Fill Your Life with Energy

TRACEY BETHUNE ON BUSINESS UNVEILED

How to Attract Harmony and Fill Your Life with Energy

I know that 2020 was, and has been, for some people, a crazy year. Some of you have thrived and some of you have taken a step back. It’s given all of us, however, the opportunity to look at the inner world, the inner self and how we can win as an individual. We all want peace. We all want harmony. Our guest Tracey Bethune, Whole Life Strategist and fitness enthusiast, is going to give you some actionable takeaways on how you can create harmony within your business and within yourself. 

It’s important to have harmony in your work. When you’re launching a business, there are a few things you can do to make the process go smoothly. First off, make sure that what you are doing aligns with who you are. If it doesn’t, it won’t work. You will always be led back to yourself. Know your strengths and use them. This will increase the harmony in your relationship with your business. Also, you absolutely need help. DIY business don’t work. Invest in some help from professionals that have done what you want to do. 

Not only do you want harmony with your business, but also in your relationships with other people. How you treat other people will affect the success of your business. Be willing to serve other people because they, in turn, can connect you with opportunities that you would never have found without them. The good things you do will increase the likelihood of the right people being in your life. 

When we talk about harmony, a lot of people think about boundaries. Tracey has an interesting perspective on boundaries. She believes that boundaries have a negative connotation and are usually associated with bad experiences. Instead of using the word boundaries, she uses the word standards. This switch changes the focus from the things that you don’t want to the things that you do want. The word standards just sounds more positive.

Finally, your internal energies must be balanced for you to feel harmonious. Get out the intense emotions. You can do this through exercise and through treating yourself. Everyone has masculine and feminine energies within them, and these must be harmonious for you to have maximum energy. Join our conversation to learn even more about harmony and energy! 

MAIN TOPICS
  • First things to do when you’re starting a business
  • How helping others helps you
  • A new way of thinking about boundaries
  • How to naturally generate energy
KEY TAKEAWAYS

I think the biggest breakthroughs come from the largest breakdowns.

When you just serve and show up and help the client become their highest and best and show them how to be their highest and best, that’s really all that’s needed.

Once you get super aligned, the person who’s meant to help you is going to show up in your space.

MORE ABOUT OUR GUEST

Since she was a little girl, Tracey Bethune has been obsessed with taking care of her body and physical fitness. At one point in her life, she actually owned a gym business. A life-threatening experience caused by a spider-bite, however, made her realize that while she took great care of her outer self, she wasn’t taking care of her inner self. Today, she is rocking her inner game, and she works as a coach helping others to find inner harmony. 

LINKS MENTIONED
  • Check out Tracey's Facebook Group HERE
EPISODE TRANSCRIBED

Hi, y'all. It's Angela. I'm back for another episode of business unveiled. And I'm so excited to talk with our awesome guest today. We actually met a couple months ago in person, yes, during COVID. But it's like she is like my long lost friend that I feel like I've known her forever. But the actionable things and the actionable takeaways that you can learn from her background and all the things that she draws from is just absolutely incredible. And so if you've if, depending on when you're listening to this, I know that 2020 has was and has been for some people just a crazy year. And for some of us, we have thrived. And for some of us, we have taken a step back. And so it's like, what does that really mean? And it's given us an opportunity to really look at the inner world, your inner self, and how can we win as a person as an individual?

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And how can we win and put ourselves out there to the outer world. And we all come together, and in harmony and as cheesy as it sounds sometimes, like we all strive especially women, we want peace, we want harmony, we want happiness, like I do. I don't know about y'all. But anyway. So Tracy, welcome to the show today. I'm super excited. You're here. Thank you for having me. I've been looking forward to it. Yay, I'm so excited. So before we jump in and talk about all the amazing things that you do for others, take us back to your journey. Like how did you grow up? Did you always love like helping people like take us back and tell us that journey of how you have gotten to where you are today. Okay, um, I grew up in rural America, small town, and in a very strict religious upbringing. And that was very interesting. For me, I love small town living, but I was definitely a super free spirited, open kid from day one. And so needless to say,

03:30

they didn't exactly know what to do with me. And

03:35

as I got older, I started experiencing the same things that all of us experience when we don't necessarily look like what maybe our parents or society thinks we should look like or act like or behave like. And so each time I would kind of open up as a child into this free spiritedness, something would come up and there would be a course correction or what was perceived as rejection or an acceptance. I've always loved the human body. I've been very connected with my body from day one, I was the kid that went to blockbuster when that was a thing and rented the Mickey Mouse, mouse or size, VHS instead of an actual movie. I remember that.

04:25

And that was how I think Rainbow Brite actually had one too, and I would, that's what I would do and so that I know, for you.

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I was that kid and so my love for the body kept moving into things like gymnastics, competitive clogging, and then by the age of 12, I was already bodybuilding. And Mm hmm. Because they seem crazy, right? It's not the normal like thing that a little girl would be drawn to

05:01

But I've always been very petite. And with a strict religious upbringing, I found that the only place I could feel myself was at the gym, I have a very intense energy about me. And I had no way I didn't know what to do with it. But in the gym, it was like an underground bodybuilding gym. And there was these incredible people in there that saw that in me and celebrated it. And so the gym became a place of like, that was like my church, almost it was the place where I could be.

05:37

And so that's where my journey started. And I went headlong into health and fitness. And, and I had a couple breaks from that, like when I was in college and things I moved to South Florida and did some other avenues. But I always came back to health and fitness and the gym.

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And I hit a spot in my life, I had a couple CrossFit affiliates, I was married, both of my children were under the age of two. And honestly,

06:05

I was burnt out, I was completely burnt out, I was taking care of so many people. And my ex husband also had a business. And I had these two little little beings that are also needed to take care of. And I was I had turned my own health and fitness almost into

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a punishment at that point. Yeah, it was the only thing I felt that I could control. But it It turned against me in the end.

06:36

I was also feeling called to move forward into different work. And that was resisting that some just because this is what I'd known my whole life. And it felt good to just do what you know, right? Be in that comfort zone, which no and but I find that source God universe, whatever you want to call the higher workings of this world. If you don't end up

getting aligned and going where you're supposed to go, it will force you to go that way. Your soul will come up and smack you and you'll have to go that way. And so I ended up

07:13

with my own illness I got bit by brown recluse spider, and they're super poisonous. As we all know, down here in the south. It went misdiagnosed even though we actually had the spotters and I found two of them. And

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with the misdiagnosis it actually went completely through my body and manifested into mersa, which is antibiotic resistant staph.

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And so all of a stager. Oh, it was major. Yes, it was major. At first I was like, okay, but then it literally started closing my body, right? It just started eating flesh. And I know that sounds really gross. But that's what it is. Uh huh. And y'all if you're not, I mean, the people listening, they know like my I was in health care. And so I worked for an infectious disease doctor. And the number one there was one season, we're the only season that I want to say that, that people would come in that had been bit by brown recluse and you're freaking kills people. Like and it does it eats the if you don't capture aids, it's and I'm so thankful I did work for this doctor for a short period, because I learned Little things like if you are a bit by spider to like take a pen and like circle the little area and like as it gets bigger. So anyway, like, I can't even imagine with it being misdiagnosed, like how that affected you. Like, I sorry, I mean, interrupt you go ahead, tell us not at all. And really it was, it was horrible. Yeah, um, all of a sudden, I went from looking like the epitome of health, right, I had the look. And feeling like I had all my bases covered to literally being in a fight for my life for about a year and a half. Wow. And in that time, I had to sell my gems, which was the only thing that like really fulfilled me at that point. And my marriage with the stress of everything was also falling apart. And then my kids were so little and so then I went through a stage of really not wanting to be here anymore, and asking God to basically do the deed, I didn't have the guts to do it. But when you get to that point of feeling powerless and worthless and not having anything to guide you through. There is that piece of you that is just like Okay, I'm done. I'm done. And

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so, but thank goodness, also believe that

09:51

the universe, God always works for us and will deliver and so he did answer my prayer. And it was in the form of

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Different doctor, I'd been to seven who thought outside the box. And this doctor actually put me on essential oils, and it needed to be a specific type and a specific brand to get the job done. And after all those antibiotics and all those doctors, within three days, my it had killed the mersa. And actually, my skin, everything was healing up, and I had more energy than I'd had in a year and a half, in three days, like it was it truly was a miracle. And,

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you know, if you think about the

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three days, you know, of rising again, and and no, I'm not super religious, but I'm I'm definitely fully connected to spirit and do it my way. Yes, I just looked at that. And it was like, Oh, my gosh, okay, this, and I got my life back. And but in that period, I really had to look at it and go, Okay, I always thought nutrition working out all of these things we do.

11:06

We're the answer, we're the solution.

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And what I realized was that the more control exerted over my body, the more I didn't listen to my intuition and what I was being told to do, and the more I clamped down and forced that

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that was actually the worst possible thing that I could have done. And it had the exact opposite effect of what I wanted, the more sensitive my body got, the more it

11:38

basically rebelled against me. And it just created a cycle of, you know, going deeper and deeper down into the illness. And so I was like, What is really missing here, I'm missing something, the fitness industry is missing something, the health industry is missing something. And what I discovered was that the way we understand the body, it actually works completely different than what it's taught. And when it's marketed as our body is literally feedback, and it's trying to let us know that emotionally and mentally, something is off. So when we're experiencing some kind of dis ease or discomfort in the body, it's actually doing exactly what it's supposed to do. And if I had just listened to it, the first go around. Whenever it was given me little signs, I wouldn't have had to end up so sick that there was no other option but to go the route I was supposed to go. So yeah, dug into that discovered all that. And so now, and that is what I do. And I've learned how to heart harmonize all those bodies and energies in us and to make it work for us. And yeah, it's been Holy crap, the last six years have just been so amazing and such a different path. And I just love it. But it's like you had to do you feel like you had to go through all that to like, get to where you are today? Because that's how you know how to really help others would you say? Absolutely. All of it, the divorce the illness, you know, losing the one thing that I thought was my whole world, my job is in the fitness and stuff. Absolutely. I think the biggest breakthroughs come from the largest breakdowns by far and yes,

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yes. On the other side. Mm hmm. And you don't when you're going through it, because I mean, you know, we all go through some shit.

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It's like, you're super like, when you're in it. It's like why I Why is this happening? I don't have time for this. I but sometimes, you know what, people you just got to go through it. And so I think the outcome of that is like, you know, self abandonment? And then what type of effect did it have on you? Well, for you, you started an amazing coaching business, by being able to coach others and help others. Because you've been there, you've done that you've gotten through it you've broken through, and I'm sure also it helps you, you

know, like when something happens with your kids that come up, and you're like, you know, what, this is how we're going to handle it. And this is how, you know, we're going to take you through, like, I know, you've got, um, I think you've got some videos, like your kids and like you being that free spirit you are, and it's like exposing your kids to like the real world and like, this is how it is like, that's a great thing. Like I don't I think that, you know, I know some people are like, Oh, I don't know about putting my sister used to be I don't know about putting my kids on social media. I'm like, let me put your kids on social media. Yes.

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I mean, the world we live in, like, you've got to expose them otherwise they're gonna be curious.

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Potentially learn the bad things and learn the wrong. And so, recently somebody is talking to another mom. And she's like, Oh my God, have you seen this social destruction or disruption or whatever it's called, like, yeah, I watched it on Netflix like, I've we know all this. I know, this is though I live in this world, but I know when to put it down, I know how to have boundaries. And then the kids that all have phones, like, there are boundaries. But you as the adult, if you're constantly saying you can't do this, you can't do this, they're just going to want to do it even more. So like, some form of bribery. It's like, Okay, if you do three hours of schoolwork, and then we can do three tiktoks. Or it's like, you do this and you get this, it's like you reward yourself with that, you know, if that's pleasure for them, because they love to dance. So a lot that you can like, pull away from this, you know, to become a better person become a better mom become a better coach. So for you when you said, Okay, you know what, I'm going to start a coaching business. What did you do to get started with that? Because I know there's a lot of probably women listening it What's up guys, too.

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We get most of our questions from the ladies. And they're like, how did you start? How did you get into it? And what was like the first thing that you did to actually like launch a business?

16:26

Oh, gosh,

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this is a funny one. Because as Angela knows, tech is not necessarily my thing. Okay, so, but you're gonna do better. Thank you, I am doing better. I know, I'm paying attention. And I'm asking you questions and stuff.

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But in the beginning, and for those of you listening, if you need help, just going ahead and hire Angela, please. Because

16:53

when you try to DIY this stuff, it never works. And so especially if you're not tech savvy, like I am, I mean, I can operate a computer and all that stuff, I can do the little things. But to build a funnel or email sequences or things like that, it literally makes me just want to gouge my eyeballs out, it is not my thing, it is torture as

17:15

it is, I would much rather just have somebody else do it. And in the beginning, I definitely did not do what was aligned for me, I tried to do all the things. And, of course, it didn't work. All of my clients. And when I switched over, of course, initially came from people that already known and worked with my GM and in my community. And so I started expanding that way. And every time I tried to do this stuff that isn't aligned with who I am as a person, and I didn't get help for it. Of course, it just flunked out miserably. And so there was lots of trial and error with it. And if there's one thing I can say, from the get go, find somebody doing it, and just harm and start working with them. And I promise even if you feel like it's a crunch money wise, do it anyway. Because and even when you go ahead

and decide to trust and fight or have faith and trust in that process, and you put your money there, it will work, I promise it will work.

18:21

Out have a strategy people.

18:23

So I would say for the first four years, really of my coaching business, I struggled in and out of that back and forth tech thing and trying to build these funnels and trying this software and that software and doing it the way this person said and this person said and this person said and DIY and all that. And um, needless to say, I went back to the beginning of what works for me now for me initially, it's always personal contact, that is my strength. I can you know, do a phone call, just get on and connect with somebody that way, I'm so much better at just speaking video, phone calls, whatever. That's my jam. So what I finally did was surrender to my own strengths, just align with them. And then as I grew that base, as I've grown that base, I'm at the point where I am ready to start hiring those teams to help and also had to shift my belief system that I couldn't have success without all the things you totally can. Once you get super aligned, the end the person that is meant to help you is gonna show up in your space truly. And then it's up to us to stretch ourselves as needed to make that happen. And it will if it's meant for you and you stretch and you give your faith to it will absolutely show up so

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yeah, that's that's, that was my journey. manifested and make it Yes, yes, absolutely.

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And one thing that that I learned about you quickly is like you did embrace like your current community. And then they reaped the benefits of what you were doing and what you were teaching and how you were coaching. And then they connected you to people, and then those people connected you to people. And then, I mean, you and I both have had a very good word of mouth network. And so the thing is, when you do it, and you say, you're going to do it, and you deliver, and you over deliver, and you show up consistently for your clients every day when they need you, and you're there, and you help them through these things. That is, it's just called life you're like, yeah,

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then when somebody else in need, need you, they're going to show up for you and provide you referrals and clients. And so I think that, everything that that you do, and the way that

you help people, it's the outcome that drives them so that when they see it in someone else, they're like, Oh, this girl, she can help you like, you just need to hire her. And so do you have and I laugh? Because when people ask me this, I'm like, favorite. But like, do you have like a favorite outcome or a favorite story of how it was so fulfilling to work with someone or help someone that really made an impact for you as well to like, help you figure out like, I got this, I'm good at this. I can do this, like, was there that one person? Or and it's I don't want to say favorite? Because I'm like, it's really hard to like, pick a favorite. But do you have that that one person or that one story? You know, I think everybody doubts their abilities, right? At some point, it's just natural to be like, oh, gosh, can I really do this? Do I really have the skill set to help these people? Or what if this person actually already makes more money, this is a big one for people in the industry, coaches, creatives, whatever, what if somebody comes in your space that actually on the surface, and like, say, monetary wise makes more money than you?

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That can freak people out a lot as well. And I know, in the beginning, it did for me. Um, and I think, I think my favorite story today was, um, I was actually, and I know, he won't mind me sharing, because we've talked about it before, but one of my male clients, he hired me, because he was going through a divorce, and he made good money, and he was terrified of what was going to happen. And he goes, he was just like, I know, I'm gonna need your support through this. And so I got a call one day, and it wasn't his normal session time. And I was free. And I answered it. And he was just like,

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I just wanted you to be the first to know that in the midst of this, I feel peaceful. I'm getting ready to buy my most favorite car yet. And I just busted all of the

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records in our company about four times. Wow.

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And the tears just poured, you know, I was so happy for him. And I think that was the biggest connection I had to when you just serve

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and show up and help the client become their highest and best, and show them how to be their highest and best.

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That's really all that's needed. It's not about them becoming dependent on us or anything like that. It's about them finding that groove in themselves, learning how to cultivate their own happiness, their own peace, and then transferring that into everything they do, no matter what it looks like is happening around us. And I would say that was probably my biggest turning point of like,

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there is no reason to ever doubt. You know, what God placed on your heart ever again? Yeah. Yeah. And it's a it's it's like a small thing to like hearing the story. For some people. They're probably like, oh, whatever. But like when you make that difference, and they're like, oh, you're the first to know like, you're the first call that I wanted to make, like, it's some of the smallest things that make the biggest impact on our life. And sometimes you just have to listen for him and look for him and actually like, pay attention and live in the present. Be in the now and stop worrying so much about all the other things around you. Because sometimes you just need to stop and listen. So let's just shifting gears a little bit like and thank you for sharing that with us. Absolutely. What are some of the because women we all have trouble with that.

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boundaries, boundaries. So if you could tell us like one shift that just brings you peace and success and having boundaries and like, why setting boundaries is really a strategy,
which, by the way, people, we don't learn this in school. And like, my parents didn't teach me this because they weren't entrepreneurs, like they didn't know that, like, why is it effective? Or is it not effective? Like, what? What is variance on just the big the big word here is boundaries, like what's your, what's your success rate with it. So my take on boundaries is a little bit different than most in the industry. And what I discovered through my own journey with it was that every time I went to set a boundary, okay, in the typical sense that we talk about a boundary, it normally comes out of a space of woundedness. It comes from a space of when we've been hurt in our past. And so we need to set this line in the sand and protect ourselves.

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The only issue is, that is anytime you make a decision out of woundedness, victim mentality fear, it never lands, right. And there's always a cleanup or course correction that has to happen. So in theory, boundaries sound good, but if you just feel and to the word itself, and if you just fill into your heart, when you even think about it, does the heart fill expanded and like open and you're ready to take on the world? Or does it go into contraction and like, Okay, I have to do this so that I'm going to be okay.

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And so in, in my personal experience, and with clients, it's always ended up in a contraction state. And eventually, yes, it'll take hold. Once you clean up all of that other course correction, that has to happen with the woundedness, then the boundaries will take hold. So the shift that I work with my clients on is going from operating out of the woundedness, and needing to set boundaries and walls up to operating out of standards. And if you just fill into the word standards alone, it automatically comes from a space of self self worth and value. And so you get to start moving toward the thing you want, instead of fleeing from the things you don't don't and it's an automatic shift into, Oh, wow. Okay, I don't even need to put attention on the things that I feel wounded about, yes, we work on those things. But in order to manifest what you want in your life, you know, the the bridge from the desires that are laid on our heart spiritually to our physical manifestations of those is faith. Well, if you're coming from fear and woundedness, there's no faith behind that. It's actually a lack of faith. So we have to shift that into standards. And it also doesn't come with the self righteousness either, right? It doesn't come with having to

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push things away from you that we deem toxic or whatever, you just literally get focused on what you want. And move toward that. And that is so much stronger, more powerful, it's more effective and talk about speeding up the process. It's so much faster. Yeah, yeah. In I love this take I will say like the hardest boundary for me and y'all there's, there's healthy boundaries and then there's like batshit crazy boundaries. So it's like for me for like the first 10 years of business like I 100% allowed it to consume me meaning like anytime someone called anytime someone texted anytime anything like it didn't matter. And I would tell people like 20 473 165 days a year, if you need something like I will be there for you. And it's not that I didn't mean it. But what was started to happen is when I started to experience just what you did this word burnout, and people would actually text

me at two and three in the morning it would wake me up because y'all back then do not disturb that feature didn't exist.

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Thank you apple. But it's like I didn't know how to turn it off until a mentor said You know, there there are some he's like you have to set some healthy boundaries and that stop telling people to that you're always going to be there 365 days a year you're not a doctor you're not going to save their life like your emergency and their emergency is not a year emergency and right you know, I will say like so the healthiness of the boundaries of

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Getting people to schedule calls or schedule a meeting, having the to give them the opportunity to collect their thoughts and organize what needs to go on in a meeting, I realized, that's why people are hiring us is because we're there to help them collect their thoughts and let them know what the next steps are. But I need to feel prepared to sometimes. And so not that it's a bad thing. But just, you know, like you just said, somebody called you and it wasn't scheduled, it was out of the blue. And but just think if you hadn't picked up the phone, that right, and, and that. And so sometimes, like, you've got to have a little bit of flexibility in the boundaries. But again, like when you say to people, and I just I had to quit saying it, I would say no, I was saying it. And so my mentor would would listen and and watch it on some of my meetings. And he's like, do you realize you're saying this, he's like, stop saying this, because you don't mean it? He's right, you are telling me how, how rude it is of someone to text you at two and three in the morning, but you are opening the door. Right? So it's like, you know, becoming more self aware of what you're actually saying. So that you mean what you say. And so when I think of boundaries, like I love what you're saying, but I also want to say ladies, you have to take care of you first, sometimes everybody else, exactly. This, you know, take it with a grain of salt and just make sure that you can work yourself up to being just whatever you're saying. Make sure that you actually mean it. That's the whole point to that. So I, I love that take on it. So I know that you own a gym. And you were a CrossFit lawyer, which I we have cancer and CrossFit. And I think it's awesome if your body is I think if I went to a CrossFit class, like I might break a few.

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I just I mean, I was a gymnast, but it's like, right, not that, but but y'all you have to work up to it. So it's not like you just walk into a gym and you start like doing all the things that

some you know, some of the CrossFit people do. But I know that in that world, and we even talked about this when we met how, you know, there is a really unhealthy part of being living in a healthy world and being surrounded by that of like, stimulants and working out all the time and the addictive habits and the addictive behaviors. And, you know, there's good things and there's bad things, and there's rare things and you can self generate energy and confidence. And, you know, let's let's get into the whole sex thing. It's like, what's your abs all that, you know, it's like people don't they don't want to talk about that. And I love that about you, because you do live a fit life, but you live a healthy life on the outside as well now is in the inside. So talk to people that, you know if they and listen, I love to work out. I I don't have the time to do it all the time. But I can definitely tell a difference when I make an effort to be on some type. That's arbitrary. Otherwise, yeah. But it's like if people are in that mindset, like, share with us, like how can they ditch all of that? So they're on stimulants, if they think they need this if they need it? What are some healthy ways that people can ditch some of that stuff? Oh, gosh, yes. So this is my favorite thing. And it was funny, I walked in the gym the other day, and I was experiencing Well, let me say this first they need you need to spell exercise properly and understand the gift. It's actually a gift to our physical body to move emotions through it. And what happened is this all this exercising has gotten bastardized and turned into a marketing machine, right? And so it feeds off our physical insecurities and needing you know, various thetic needing to look a certain way but here's the gift of exercise y'all.

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It literally

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and spell it with a Oh, it is exorcising the emotional identities that try to take us over.

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And so instead of approaching fitness, like I used to and what I was taught, I grew up in the 80s and so come on the fitness craze was like

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everything was low fat and aerobics yourself to death and like that was what I grew up in. So, um, but the real gift here is that it is true when our body is giving us that feedback that

something emotional is going on. One of the tools in

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Our toolbox that everybody has access to, is being able to move it through breath, right? And through the physical movement of our body. So what I work with my people on is shifting that and

35:15

I got to the gym the other day, and I was having in some intense emotions coming up. I don't try to run from them. I embrace that intensity fully. And doing heavy bag work is one of my favorite things to do. And so I ran into the gym real quick. Now y'all I was in muck boots, the whole deal I was not prepared for like, what people would consider a workout or anything, but I knew that in order for me to be good the rest of the day, I needed to go get some of that intensity and let it out without projecting on to other people. Okay, so embrace your intensity. I hopped in the gym, whacked on the heavy bag for I don't know, maybe five minutes max. Really let it just fly in there. And the whole time I'm in my head just given the world hell right. Like, I'm just let it go. And then, five minutes later, I walked out well, there was some women talking at the front doors. I know I'm there in my community. And they were like, That was quick. I was like, sometimes all you need is just a quick whip and on the heavy bag, like, it doesn't have to be this two hour deal. Your body responds to alignment.

36:25

Mm hmm. If you're aligned emotionally, mentally, spiritually, the physical body will follow.

36:35

Yep. And so my,

36:39

my body what I do for my physical health is drastically different than what I used to do. I'm a dance, I'm a self pleasure is a fantastic way to move emotions and to feel better. I mean, come on.

36:56

So, you know, I'm there been, I'm gonna be really candid here. And maybe TMI, but it's something that needs to be said and heard women got to give yourself permission to feel orgasmically healthy. And there's days where I'm a self pleasure three times in one day, and it moves everything forward. Our number one job is to get aligned and feel good inside of ourselves. And if it's self pleasure, it's hitting the heavy bag. If it's just giving yourself some nice downtime, whatever that looks like, as soon as you get your alignment, your physical body will respond. I don't know why as women we, at least because we grew up during the same time. It was so like, the woman has to do everything we have to cook, we have to clean we have to do this. I mean, thank God, like things are a little bit different now. Yes. But as I grew up, and I watched this, it was I was never the little girl that like and I mean, I had a great mother, who like did all that cooked and cleaned and I raised three kids and I'm like, I never want

38:06

to say

38:08

yeah, this is why when I met you, I'm like, oh my god. She's like, my other sister from another mother. I'm just like,

38:17

yeah, I mean, again, there's nothing wrong with it. But right, not there was more to life. And like, yes, we work hard, but then we play hard. Yes.

38:29

Earn. It's like, you know, you you can you can pleasure yourself in in lots of different ways. I mean, for some girls that shopping like they feel amazing. When they go shopping me I feel amazing when I shop for other people because Oh, yeah.

38:48

Like, so it's like, really want to think like, yes, work hard. But you know what, you're going

to be miserable in your work if you don't find something that makes you happy? Yes. What I've learned over the years from being married, and also divorced is, you know, you hear so much maybe like in the fantasy movies of you're not complete until you find your other half and your other soulmate.

39:13

And then one day I'm like listening to online church and the guys like, you have to be 100% complete with you don't don't bring another person or a partner or a husband or a wife or or anybody else into your relationship until your relationship is 100% whole with you. Because yes, we have the power to make you happy. It doesn't rely on someone else. And then one time I was listening to that I was laying next to the guy I was dating and I'm like, you know what, I just don't think this is good work. Good for you.

39:49

Long time coming, but it just felt so pushed, and so much pressure. And I mean even my best friend at the time. I mean, she's

40:00

So my best friend from grade school, she's like, you've always had a guy or somebody that like your width that you always have to take care of. And I'm like, God, you're right. Like, I don't want that. But I was raised that way. So I thought that that was what I needed to be doing. And so it's like, I got rid of some of the toxicity and the energy. And then I was able to focus more on my business and growing that and which brings me happiness, like, you know, when we can help more people, and it makes the business thrive. So it's not necessarily about looking for the pill, or the food or the right coffee, or caffeine or whatever, you can be whole without all of that. It's just putting your putting your focus and your energy like into healthy things, that is going to be a good outcome. Because I'm here to tell you just by growing up around lots of drugs, like drugs is not the answer. It's not. It's not an alcohol is not always the answer. Like it's nice to have some, you know, wine here and there. But like to think that you're going to be happier to mask what the real feeling is, under your heart. Don't use the stimulants don't use the drugs, because there's way more to happiness than that. Yeah. And I'm actually glad you brought up the wholeness thing. Um, and I want to address that really quickly, just because it's perfect. What a lot of people when we talk about wholeness, we need to know exactly what that is. And I'm because I mean, if you think about it, what is that, like? What does wholeness look like? To us, and we have two energies inside of us, every single person has them, it is not reliant on

gender. Okay, so when I say masculine and feminine, I'm not talking male and female, I'm literally talking about the two energies, the qualities that we have inside of each one of us. The very first union and marriage that we have in this world is the union between those two energies. And so we don't learn this in school, we don't learn this from our parents, either. It's learning what those energies, the qualities of those energies, okay?

42:24

harmonizing those two energies, and then deliberately creating your life because the masculine, the healthy masculine energies are drive passion, vision, commitment, and you have to have those things as a business owner, if you don't lead with your masculine energies, now, I'm not talking male, okay? I'm just masculine energies, those are the energies that is going to lead the ship it has to, you can't just sit here in love and expect your business to grow, right? You know, this.

42:57

A lot of people are like, I'm just gonna sit here and just let everybody know. So you've got to have your vision, you've got to have that, that passion and that follow through. And then your feminine side, gets to actually come in and support that. And the way it supports it is with the little details. It's with the intuitive part of listening for the next steps. It's in, you know, when you're really moving towards something, it's looking yourself in the mirror and going Oh, hell yeah, you so got this a lot of times, we end up using our own feminine to self sabotage or take us out with our the narrative in our heads and things like that. It's literally us imploding on ourselves and taking out our own healthy masculine like, so it's harmonizing these two energies. And whenever these are off, it will create that disharmony and that dis ease in that uncomfortable and you're going to see that reflected in your outer world. If there's something in your outer world that feels off or is not going the way you'd really like it to go, you've got to go back to these basics. And the basics is the number one relationship that we have from day one is that inner union in us of that masculine and feminine and it's such a beautiful dance, we get to dance if we know the dance, we're dancing, you know what I mean? So

44:21

I wanted to bring awareness to that's what wholeness is it's, it's harmonizing those two energies. And

44:27

there's also aspects to those energies that a lot of the people that do teach masculine and feminine they miss masculine and feminine has its dual nature. So you have the, you know, you have the ideal masculine and you also have the limited masculine, which would be like the mama's boy or the tyrant or the abuser. Everybody likes to call masculine all of a sudden toxic. No, it's not all toxic. There is beautiful qualities to our masculine side, which include that vision. I mean, without vision, nothing in this world would move right so um,

45:00

Such beautiful qualities there. And then the feminine qualities of flow in love in the ideal side, but on the limited, its controlling, manipulative, chaotic, like. So those two sides of those energies we need to know. And navigating that is, is the number one thing when you're when those are in harmony, you can't help but not feel good. Right? Amen. And there's nothing wrong with feeling good. Absolutely not. Absolutely not.

45:30

It's a good thing. Yes. And something that you say that I love is like, life is simpler than we make it. Like, don't make it so difficult. And when you're in a negative headspace, you're right. Like people Oh, that's toxic. And it's like, what about the, the the good things in it? Like, why are we not looking at the good things? Because usually there is something good that come that can come out of a bad or a negative salutely. So if people want to connect with you, because I could talk to you all day about it.

46:06

Okay, I'm like, unfortunately, running out of time. But I know you have a Facebook group. So yeah, we want to come into the group. How can they do that?

46:16

Yes, so the Facebook group is down dirty, real, and the link of I know we get down in there.

46:25

I love to be wrong, and you're gonna get it completely wrong. Um, so yeah, the Facebook

group, I sent the link, if we want to put it in the notes, you can just click there. And also, once you join in, there's going to be three questions. One of them includes your email, when you join, I'm going to send over some masculine and feminine cheat sheets. And some more information on that to get you started, you can start looking at harmonizing those energies immediately. And I do private trainings in there. It's exclusive content I don't put anywhere else. So you can start there. I love it. Thank you so much for sharing this. And then if they want to connect with you on social, what's your favorite platform. So right now it'd be Instagram. Um, I'm on there, probably the most as far as like dm and some extra content and things that I share. I would say Instagram and that's at Tracy dot, buffoon, B, E th you in E. Awesome. And we'll put it all in the show notes. And everybody that is listening today. Thank you so much for your time. I know you got great nuggets out of this. Make sure that you go join Tracy's Facebook group, especially if you're in that season of needing to discover who you are. set some boundaries. And really, if you're in that business growth phase, that's like the best time to do this because it's going to give you the confidence to grow. And the confidence to move forward. Like we started to like bring this full circle. To bring it all full circle is like you really have to get clear on some things before you can move forward. So Tracy, thanks so much for being on the show today. Thank you for having me. I so enjoyed it. Yay. And everybody that's listening. Be sure that you tune in next week for another episode of business unveiled by yo. That's it for this week's episode of business unveiled. Now that you have all the tools that you need to conquer the world and GSD get shit done. Would you share this with your friends and fellow business leaders? One thing that would really really help us and help new listeners

is for you to rate the show. And leave a comment and Apple podcast, Spotify, Stitcher, or wherever you tune in and listen to business unveiled. You can check out the show notes at Angela proffitt.com slash podcast and link up with us on social media so you can share your biggest insights. And I want to know your aha moments. Until next week, remember, the profitable shifts and structures you're creating in your business help you be more present in your life. So get out there and GSD

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Published: March 25, 2021

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